Op-Ed: Laugh At Yourselves, Please

June 3, 2013 1:19 pm
Op-Ed: Laugh At Yourselves, Please

What up, flipstronauts? Graduation is upon us. As all y’all seniors finally breach the bubble and start getting paid to do things you wouldn’t otherwise spend your time doing, the Flipside has one request: please laugh at yourselves. For the last four years, grownups have told you that you’re the […]

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Op-ed: Using Me Properly Doesn’t Make You Some Kind of Hotshot

May 20, 2013 12:48 pm
Op-ed: Using Me Properly Doesn’t Make You Some Kind of Hotshot

By: A semicolon Hi, semicolon here; you’ve probably heard of me. You’ve also probably used me to show off on numerous occasions. Yeah, I’m onto you. You think that sprinkling me in liberally throughout your essays and papers will make you look like a literary Albert Einstein. You’re pretty damn […]

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Book Review: The Great Gatsby or The Great Gaffesby?

May 15, 2013 9:00 am
Book Review: The Great Gatsby or The Great Gaffesby?

In my younger and more vulnerable years I believed that books could one day rival movies in their vividness and complexity. Sadly, civilization’s going to pieces; I’ve gotten to be a terrible pessimist about things. For those of you looking for a little light, spring reading, F. Scott Fitzgerald (or […]

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Movie Review: The Great Gatsby – The Movie was WAY Better than the Book

May 13, 2013 12:00 pm
Movie Review: The Great Gatsby – The Movie was WAY Better than the Book

My best friend and I were lucky enough to snag tickets to The Great Gatsby on opening weekend, and let me tell you, Baz Luhrmann really outdid himself. The costumes were amazing, the acting was impeccable, and the soundtrack was totally awesome. On the way home I couldn’t stop going […]

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Opinion: I’m So Full

May 8, 2013 9:00 am
Opinion: I’m So Full

Oh man, guys. I’m so full. Arrillaga is really killing it tonight. Who in their right mind would serve macaroni and cheese on the same day as the panini station? It wasn’t that boxed shit either; the cheese was creamy and it had a breadcrumb crust. I couldn’t even handle […]

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Opinion: My Roommate is my Arch Nemesis

May 6, 2013 12:00 pm
Opinion: My Roommate is my Arch Nemesis

I’m not one to toot my own horn, but I’m generally a pretty decent person. I pay my taxes, retrieve cats from trees, and I’ve even rescued people from burning buildings. There are few feats of daring that I won’t attempt, and there are even fewer people that I don’t […]

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Op-Ed: YOLO, or Thus Cries the Idiot

April 29, 2013 12:02 pm
Op-Ed: YOLO, or Thus Cries the Idiot

By Friedrich Nietzsche Weightless. — What, if some day or night a demon were to steal after you into your loneliest loneliness and say to you: “This life is singular — never to be repeated — each moment ephemeral, lost no sooner than it has finished; every pain and every […]

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Opinion: Spring Makes Me Horny

April 9, 2013 9:00 am
Opinion: Spring Makes Me Horny

The sun is shining, flowers are growing, birds are singing, and……okay those two squirrels are doing it. But I guess that’s spring for you. Because it’s getting warmer all the animals are coming out of their winter hibernation, and honestly, my little guy is waking up too. See the thing […]

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Op-Ed: That’s My Sock

March 15, 2013 6:00 am
Op-Ed: That’s My Sock

Hey, listen. Yeah, I know we’ve never talked, but I saw you from over there, and, well, there’s no easy way to say this…but that’s my sock, yeah, that one, on your foot. Look, it doesn’t even match your other one. I don’t know how you didn’t notice when you […]

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Opinion: You’d Make a Great MILF

March 14, 2013 6:00 am
Opinion: You’d Make a Great MILF

Hi.  I think we need to straighten something out.  I’m really not into you right now.  I know that may come as a shock, and I know it’s a little disappointing, but something is missing here, and I think I know what it is: a kid.  I think you’d make […]

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