Opinion: “Let’s Talk About the Giant Particle Accelerator in the Room”

January 30, 2012 6:00 am
Opinion: “Let’s Talk About the Giant Particle Accelerator in the Room”

By A SLAC Employee This is hard. I don’t want to make things awkward between us, but there’s something on my mind I think we need to discuss. Every day we come to work—we try to solve the mysteries of the universe, try to develop a better understanding of the […]

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Opinion: It’s Colder This Year Than Last Year

December 9, 2011 6:00 am
Opinion: It’s Colder This Year Than Last Year

Dude, what the heck? It’s like, so much colder than it was last year. I know I say this every year, but this time it really seems like it’s a lot colder. Stanford usually is pretty balmy in the winter, at least, that’s the way I remember it. It’s pretty […]

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A Letter From Flipside Editor Barney Schmutz: I’ll Tell You What We’ll Do If We Find Your Name on that List

May 28, 2011 9:00 am
A Letter From Flipside Editor Barney Schmutz: I’ll Tell You What We’ll Do If We Find Your Name on that List

News has been flitting around the campus lately that the ASSU will be releasing the names of students who request a refund from Special Fees groups. Here at the Flipside, we are very excited to get the names of people on this list, and I’ll tell you right here what […]

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OPINION: Earth Day Perpetuates a Cycle of Planetary Discrimination

May 12, 2011 9:00 am
OPINION: Earth Day Perpetuates a Cycle of Planetary Discrimination

Every April 22, thousands come together to “celebrate the beauty of the planet we call home.” But while our precious “environmentalists” promote their ever so special “Earth Day,” they are doing nothing more than legitimizing planetary discrimination and Earth superiority. According to a recent survey conducted by Reuters News Service, […]

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Opinion: Thanks A Bunch, But I Already Fucking Knew That I Look Tired

May 5, 2011 9:00 am
Opinion: Thanks A Bunch, But I Already Fucking Knew That I Look Tired

I know I’m tired. I was there when I stayed up until 4:30 am finishing two problem sets. I was also there when the loud-ass construction trucks started their incessant beeping at 7 am. I can clearly see the dark circles under my eyes every time I walk past a […]

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OPINION: Days of the Week Have Feelings Too

March 8, 2011 10:00 pm
OPINION:  Days of the Week Have Feelings Too

By Tuesday It has recently come to my attention that for the past couple of centuries people have been referring to me as “fat”. In all honesty, this is pretty offensive. Okay, maybe I did eat a bit too much lamb that one time back in 1148. But I’ve been […]

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Opinion: Selling Chocolate Vaginas is Wrong—It Objectifies Chocolate

February 13, 2011 1:39 pm
Opinion: Selling Chocolate Vaginas is Wrong—It Objectifies Chocolate

This week, I received several e-mails promoting “V-Week” events—film screenings, panel discussions, Oprah praising sessions, etc. But while vaginas are certainly to be celebrated (believe me—I love vaginas just as much as the next guy), I take issue with the V-Week Chocolate Vagina sale. In their rush to promote their […]

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How I Got Into Stanford

January 27, 2011 10:19 pm
How I Got Into Stanford

By A Mountain Lion Hello. I’m a mountain lion. You may have heard about me recently. You see, last week I was the first mountain lion in my family to make it into college. Not just any college—the college—my college—Stanford. I’m writing this because over the past several days, several […]

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Why Vampire Mothers Are Superior

January 26, 2011 9:15 am
Why Vampire Mothers Are Superior

A lot of people wonder how Vampire parents raise such stereotypically successful kids. They wonder what it’s like inside the family and whether they could do it too. Well, I can tell them because I’ve done it. I’m using the term “Vampire mother” loosely. I know some werewolf, zombie and […]

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Op-Ed: There Will Be Many More Bowl Games, But Only One First Day of Winter Quarter 2011

January 7, 2011 4:32 pm
Op-Ed: There Will Be Many More Bowl Games, But Only One First Day of Winter Quarter 2011

They say everybody does things they regret. That statement has never rang truer than it does now, now as I’m flying on the plane home from Miami, wondering what might have been. Sure, going to the orange bowl was the sensible thing to do, but there are certain opportunities that […]

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