Don’t Vote In ASSU Senate Elections!

April 5, 2009 11:22 am
Don’t Vote In ASSU Senate Elections!

Now that we are amidst ASSU election week, it is time for everyone to make some difficult decisions. Those decisions range from trivial choices such as, “Who should I vote for for ASSU Executive slate?” to such life-or-death choices like, “What dining hall should I eat at next Wednesday at […]

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Vote Student Wellness For ASSU Senate

11:20 am
Vote Student Wellness For ASSU Senate

By Stanley Waters This week, as students across campus are deciding which candidates they will support in the upcoming ASSU Senate Elections, many eyes are turned towards Student Wellness. Althoguth Mr. Wellness has resisted guerrilla campaign tactics like many of his opponents, he has still garnered almost universal support. For […]

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Vote ********** for ASSU Senate!

11:19 am
Vote ********** for ASSU Senate!

The name says it all. Most likely, you’ve already seen ********** ‘s flier taped to a bulletin board. We decided to endorse this particular candidate because ********** really stands out to us. You can easily distinguish ********** from the rest of the pack, it’s just that x-factor. With a unique […]

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Stanford Bookstore Astounds Students With All Time Low Prices

April 3, 2009 8:06 pm
Stanford Bookstore Astounds Students With All Time Low Prices

STANFORD–On the cool, misty morning of January 5th, the Stanford Bookstore kicked off the new quarter with its usual blockbuster sale. By 7:30 A.M., a full thirty minutes before opening, the 7% discount on required textbooks and course readers had attracted enough students to form a line that wrapped around […]

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March Madness To Be Covered Under Universal Health Care

March 29, 2009 11:00 pm
March Madness To Be Covered Under Universal Health Care

After learning that the disease often contracted in the spring, March Madness, was not covered in America’s healthcare plan for millions of citizens, President Obama decided action was necessary. At a press conference earlier today, The President addressed the issue, “This is a serious problem. We need to change the […]

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Math Becomes Interdisciplinary

10:55 pm
Math Becomes Interdisciplinary

Subject Combines Study of Foreign Language With Math In a move that showcases Stanford’s ever powerful ability to locate ties between disparate subject areas, Math has been merged with the foreign language department. “For a long time we imported Math professors simply to make math as hard as possible to […]

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Letter From the Editor: Ensuring the Financial Future of the Flipside

10:50 pm
Letter From the Editor: Ensuring the Financial Future of the Flipside

If you’ve been reading the Stanford Daily lately, or skimming the headlines of the New York Times to keep you superficially informed, you know that the Daily is going downhill. So are lots of other newspapers because they are based on old-world print models like advertising. But at the Flipside, […]

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Student In Trouble For Irresponsible Guests

March 8, 2009 4:06 pm
Student In Trouble For Irresponsible Guests

Parents Found Puking, Vandalizing; Son Put on Probation By Jorie Carmeister STANFORD—Freshman student Troy Altman, a member of the dorm Naranja, is now on probation after hosting several guests who failed to respect dormitory rules. According to the RA, the guests were found puking on the floor, tearing down posters, […]

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OPINION: Why Didn’t Anyone Tell me Max Weinstein Was Jewish!?

3:58 pm
OPINION: Why Didn’t Anyone Tell me Max Weinstein Was Jewish!?

By Joel Weinstein JERUSALEM—I like to think I’m a reasonable person. I know how to think, I can make logical inferences about the world, and on rare occasions I’ve even been known to think outside of the box, but last Thursday I was shocked when, while looking through the local […]

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Trojan Fooled into Ranking Stanford Most Sexually Healthy

March 6, 2009 2:07 am
Trojan Fooled into Ranking Stanford Most Sexually Healthy

In a recent study funded by Trojan and conducted by an independent research firm, Stanford was found to be the most sexually healthy school in the nation. Sitting on top of Columbia and Cornell for the first time gave administrators and students a very, very good feeling. Unfortunately, recent information […]

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