Articles by: Eric Kofman

Jell-O Seismic Detection System Goes Into Effect

May 1, 2011 3:10 pmComments Off on Jell-O Seismic Detection System Goes Into Effect
Jell-O Seismic Detection System Goes Into Effect

In light of the recent catastrophic earthquake and tsunami in Japan, Stanford’s Geophysics department has placed giant vats of Kraft Jell-O at various locations around campus. The initiative, spearheaded by earthquake-expert Professor Walker Johnson, has been met with great acclaim from both the university administration and student body. “We were […]

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Stanford Announces IHUM 2

April 19, 2011 2:54 pmComments Off on Stanford Announces IHUM 2
Stanford Announces IHUM 2

PALO ALTO-In a highly anticipated press conference Friday morning, Stanford’s administration revealed the eagerly awaited IHUM 2 to a crowd of humanities buffs and early adopters. IHUM fans in the audience were not disappointed– Michelle Schwartz, a proud user of the first IHUM, told Gizmodo that Stanford’s newest innovation was […]

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United States Launches Thumb War On Libya

April 10, 2011 6:15 pmComments Off on United States Launches Thumb War On Libya
United States Launches Thumb War On Libya

In an unprecedented display of raw Presidential power, Barack Obama has single-handedly embroiled himself in a heated thumb war with Libyan leader Muammar Gaddafi. What initially appeared to be just another cursory diplomatic handshake took a violent turn when Obama clenched his fingers into his counterpart’s palm and muttered, “Bring […]

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Kappa Sigma Loses House, Brothers Adopt Hunter-Gatherer Lifestyle.

April 3, 2011 8:28 pmComments Off on Kappa Sigma Loses House, Brothers Adopt Hunter-Gatherer Lifestyle.
Kappa Sigma Loses House, Brothers Adopt Hunter-Gatherer Lifestyle.

After losing their housing for the next academic year, members of Kappa Sigma seem to have reverted to a primitive hunter-gatherer lifestyle. Kappa Sigma brothers have been sighted at various locations around campus scavenging for beer and attempting to build rudimentary shelters and squirrel catchers. Many students worry for the […]

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