Stunning survey results have recently shown that new Stanford freshmen are not yet sick of the dining hall food. Even more amazingly, a record low 2% of freshmen are anticipating being sick of the food in the next two weeks. “I think it’s been great so far,” exclaimed a wide-eyed freshman, Ashley Wu. “I love having the exact same pizza options every day.” Experts predict this phenomenon will last at most another two and a half weeks.
SILICON VALLEY, CA–iPhone developers from the Silicon Valley area recently launched a new app called SpotFlag,...
Vaden Health Center – After taking x-rays on the swollen writing hand of Marcus Washburn, the dominant Math 51 test-taker...
Like all great Jewish athletes before him, all one of them, Andrew Luck will choose not to play against Colorado this...
New TV comedy, Postmodern Family, premiers on ABC this week. The show follows a family of avatars living in a futuristic, utopian, virtual suburb of LA. The main family is a group of time travelers who can only partially control when and where they go, leading to numerous comedic situations. […]Read more ›
On the first night of the quarter, the residence of Kappa Sigma set a record for the number of girls caught spending the night. The grand total of thirty-two girls shattered the previous record of three, a figure that had stood on the books since 1924. Especially surprising was the […]Read more ›
WASHINGTON, D.C–Amid skepticism of the future viability of the Social Security program, the government passed a sweeping reform to protect your social life and ensure your long-term social viability. Government statistics have shown that America’s awkwardness has grown 80% each year since the Internet went viral in the 90s. This […]Read more ›