Area Man Disappointed That Girls Don’t Flirt the Way They Do On TV

Saratoga, CA – Fred Collins was spotted this morning leaving a Peet’s…

Student at a Loss for New Things to Bitch About

As winter quarter heads into its fifth week, freshman Meagan Farley has…

Rihanna Reveals “Hopeless Place” to be NYC Dumpster

This past Saturday, pop megastar Rihanna revealed what her fans have long…

Breaking News: Student Attends Office Hours Solely For Purposes of Kissing Up to Professor, Getting Help on P-Set

In a stunning revelation that is sending shock waves throughout East Campus,…

Decision to Euthanize IHUM Sparks Controversy

IHUM used to be a thriving forum where students sparred and matched…

Arts Corner: “There’s No Way That Photo Was Taken in February”

On Thursday morning, February 2nd, Sophomore Henry Mathis allegedly pulled out his…

Groundhog Sees Its Shadow, Forecasts 6 More Weeks of 75 and Sunny

King Jong-un starts e-Harmony profile, seeking “passionate, well rounded soul mate”

Since being declared supreme leader of North Korea after his father’s death,…