47
Flipside Poll: Can I get change for a twenty?
Can I get change for a twenty?(trends)
February 16th, 2010
Issue 47 Puzzles
February 16th, 2010ASSU Matchmaker Pairs Entire Female Campus with David Gobaud
While organizers initially dubbed the premiere of the ASSU Matchmaker Service a success, reports of tampering have led students and administrators alike to question the effectiveness of the service.
By...
February 16th, 2010
Mathematicians Discover New “160 Proof,” Get Totally Wasted
ATLANTA, GA—Last week, at the 4th Annual Conference of Mathematicians, Brent Foster of Arizona State University shocked the mathematics community when he presented his new form of proof. “For years,...
February 16th, 2010
Vancouver Welcomes Cross-Country Snowboarding For Newest Olympic Event
Evolved not from the highest levels of competition, but in the everyday jostling of the lift lines, the rising popularity of cross-country snowboarding has vaulted the event onto the Olympic stage. The...
February 16th, 2010
Facebook Feeling Pressure From Fast Growing Group: ‘1,000,000 Members and Facebook Has To Go Back to Old Format’
So far 35 people have joined, mostly from the Southworth Middle School network.
February 16th, 2010
Soap Running Out!
GOVERNOR’S CORNER –Fear and unrest have taken control of Apartment 205 of Suites-Jenkins after the six-man suite realized its supply of hand soap was dwindling. “We’re trying to make do,”...
February 12th, 2010
Bill Clinton Hospitalized for Paper Cut
Former President Bill Clinton was hospitalized this Thursday to obtain medical care for what doctors concluded was a massive paper cut. Doctors immediately bandaged the wound and gave his boo-boo a...
February 12th, 2010
What Professors Do During Office Hours
February 10th, 2010
Seven Year Old Actually Becomes Chocolate Ice Cream
Despite warnings from his grandmother, seven year old Ricky Goldberg continued to eat chocolate ice cream until he actually became a pile of chocolate ice cream. “I always told him, ‘You know...
February 10th, 2010
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World Shocked To Discover “Wikileaks” Divulges Classified Information
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Paul the Psychic Octopus Retires from Professional Predicting, Ponders Next Steps
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Famous One In a Million World Cup Octopus is Actually Just One In 64 If you Do the Math
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How did you celebrate being American on the 4th of July?
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American Celebrates Independence, Moves Into Parents’ Basement
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