Marc Tessier-Lavigne to Allow Two Hottest People From Each Dorm to Get On Ark

February 27, 2017 12:00 pm
Marc Tessier-Lavigne to Allow Two Hottest People From Each Dorm to Get On Ark

STANFORD, CA — As the threat of flood increases each day of this rainy season at Stanford, Marc Tessier-Lavigne has announced a plan for the two hottest people from each dorm to begin boarding his ark. “At some point everyone will have to accept the reality of this armageddon flood […]

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Hacker Realizes The Real Mainframe Was Inside Him All Along

February 13, 2017 5:31 pm
Hacker Realizes The Real Mainframe Was Inside Him All Along
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Dear RCC: I’m Pretty Sure My Computer Is A Crockpot

December 5, 2016 12:00 pm
Dear RCC: I’m Pretty Sure My Computer Is A Crockpot

Dear RCC, 
 Whether it was a classic Holiday mix-up, or it’s been that way all along, I have some suspicions that my computer (previously thought to be a standard word-processing container) is in fact a crockpot. My first issue with this came up when I tried to turn in […]

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MIT Physicist-Restauranteurs Create Asian-Fusion Reactor

11:59 am
MIT Physicist-Restauranteurs Create Asian-Fusion Reactor
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Study: Everyone Else Is Doing Way Better Than You In Every Way

November 28, 2016 12:00 pm
Study: Everyone Else Is Doing Way Better Than You In Every Way

A research team at the Stanford psychology department recently completed a two year study on you and every single other person. After a comprehensive review of the results, the research team concluded that everyone else has it better than you in every single way, most likely because you suck so […]

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Fake News Writers Not Sure Whether To Trust News That They Are Out Of A Job

12:00 pm
Fake News Writers Not Sure Whether To Trust News That They Are Out Of A Job

INTERNET — This past election cycle, a particularly contentious topic has been fake news sites, websites that intentionally provide misinformation to gullible readers on social media. Up until now, writing for a fake news site was quite easy, but reports of an increasingly cautious public has led bogus news writers […]

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