Articles by: Skylar Cohen

Rumor: Apple to Unveil MacBook Hair

May 8, 2014 9:00 amComments Off on Rumor: Apple to Unveil MacBook Hair
Rumor: Apple to Unveil MacBook Hair

Thrilling investors after years of similar product releases, rumors have indicated that a third member will be joining the MacBook family: the MacBook Hair. According to reports, the MacBook Hair gives users a “new way to express their individuality by styling the hair attached to their MacBook. The hair comes in […]

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Student Uses Time Machine to Alter Winter Quarter Grades

April 8, 2014 9:00 amComments Off on Student Uses Time Machine to Alter Winter Quarter Grades
Student Uses Time Machine to Alter Winter Quarter Grades

Physics major Chad Longsdell, ’15, is facing an Honor Code violation as a result of using a time machine to salvage his originally-awful winter quarter finals. Officials have accused Longsdell of travelling back to the end of Winter Quarter, finding his past self and giving his past self the answers […]

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Afraid of Admitting Anything, Stanford Admissions Plummet

April 2, 2014 9:00 amComments Off on Afraid of Admitting Anything, Stanford Admissions Plummet
Afraid of Admitting Anything, Stanford Admissions Plummet

The number of admissions at Stanford fell to a record low this year, as people chose to keep more and more things a secret. “Last year I admitted that I actually had a Berkeley shirt and was glad Stanford had Pepsi products,” said Blake Billsworth ’15, “But it seems like […]

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Student Launches Kickstarter Campaign to Buy Subway Lunch

March 3, 2014 12:00 pmComments Off on Student Launches Kickstarter Campaign to Buy Subway Lunch
Student Launches Kickstarter Campaign to Buy Subway Lunch

Ambitious entrepreneur Jake Carter ’14 has just launched a crowdfunding campaign on the website Kickstarter to raise enough money to buy a sandwich at Subway in Tressider Union. “Going to the ATM is too much work, and I don’t think any of my friends are nearby to lend me the cash,” said […]

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Student Starts Anti-Helmet Campaign

February 26, 2014 9:00 amComments Off on Student Starts Anti-Helmet Campaign
Student Starts Anti-Helmet Campaign

A group of concerned students on campus have stepped forward to create a new student organization, Hopeless Helmets, to combat one of Stanford’s most unacknowledged safety hazards. Club Founder and President Carl Muntz ’14 explains that the mission of the group is to eliminate the protective biking headgear once and […]

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Inspired by Flappy Bird, Nintendo Erases Itself From History

February 22, 2014 9:00 amComments Off on Inspired by Flappy Bird, Nintendo Erases Itself From History
Inspired by Flappy Bird, Nintendo Erases Itself From History

Following Dong Nguyen’s bewildering decision to delete the hit game “Flappy Bird” based on fear of gamers’ addiction, Nintendo has decided to erase any evidence that the famed company ever existed. “We’re trying to adapt to the market, and that means getting rid of your own products,” said Kirby Richards, […]

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Chemistry Department Offers CHEM 31Z

February 10, 2014 12:01 pmComments Off on Chemistry Department Offers CHEM 31Z
Chemistry Department Offers CHEM 31Z

The Stanford chemistry department has announced the creation of Chem 31Z, an accelerated version of accelerated chemistry. According to Rosalind Watson, vice-director of the Emergent Class Council, the course comprehensively covers the introductory chemistry sequence in 24 hours. “We offer accelerated classes for people who already have a strong background […]

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