Articles by: Matt King Bernstein

Ram’s Head’s Production of “Chicago” Apparently Not New Study Abroad Program

April 17, 2018 12:00 pmComments Off on Ram’s Head’s Production of “Chicago” Apparently Not New Study Abroad Program
Ram’s Head’s Production of “Chicago” Apparently Not New Study Abroad Program

In what has been misleadingly marketed as “Stanford’s Newest Study Abroad Program,” the Ram’s Head Theatrical Society’s ongoing production of Chicago is startling audience members when they discover that entry into Memorial Auditorium does not, in fact, transport them 2165.1 miles northeast to the windy city itself. “False advertising really […]

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Movie Review: My Parents Were Right: I Saw Call Me by Your Name, and Now I Can’t Stop Fucking Peaches

January 22, 2018 11:59 amComments Off on Movie Review: My Parents Were Right: I Saw Call Me by Your Name, and Now I Can’t Stop Fucking Peaches
Movie Review: My Parents Were Right: I Saw Call Me by Your Name, and Now I Can’t Stop Fucking Peaches

Okay you guys, I hate to admit it, but my parents were right: I saw the critically acclaimed movie Call Me by Your Name, and now I can’t stop fucking peaches.   Listen, this movie certainly deserves praise for its heartfelt and raw portrayal of a budding romance between man […]

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Gaieties actor on vocal rest ends up taking permanent vow of silence, no one cares

November 14, 2017 3:09 pmComments Off on Gaieties actor on vocal rest ends up taking permanent vow of silence, no one cares
Gaieties actor on vocal rest ends up taking permanent vow of silence, no one cares

Sources confirmed yesterday that an actor in Gaieties 2017 who has been on vocal rest for the past three days, Gen Erick ‘21, has decided to take a permanent vow of silence. Other sources confirmed that no one cares. “I just feel more at peace than I’ve ever felt,” typed […]

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Man Known For Poorly Drawn Swastikas Now Taking ARTSTUDI 145

October 5, 2017 5:00 pmComments Off on Man Known For Poorly Drawn Swastikas Now Taking ARTSTUDI 145
Man Known For Poorly Drawn Swastikas Now Taking ARTSTUDI 145

In light of the criticism his swastikas drew for being only “swastika-like”, the man who has been drawing said symbols around campus has decided to enroll in ARTSTUDI 145, Intro to Painting, in an effort to perfect the symbol. “For our first class, we were just supposed to be painting […]

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