Local Overachiever to Go Work at McKinsie and Co.

March 5th, 2009

Report: Stanford No Longer Well-Endowed

A report released yesterday by USA Today revealed that Stanford, in the midst of the nation’s crisis, can no longer be considered “well-endowed.” Vice Provost for Undergraduate Education John Bravman was “saddened” but remained optimistic. “Why do you have to always compare us to other schools...

March 1st, 2009

Entrepreneur Excited to Start New Romantic Venture

Recent graduate and Silicon Valley technology entrepreneur Jason Pirloni claimed he was “extremely excited about the prospects” of a new romantic venture he was pursuing. The project, named Jessica Simon, has been in the works since he met her two months ago. “It’s looking really good,” Pirloni...

March 1st, 2009

Housed Sororities Move to Tressider

March 1st, 2009

TA Spends Another Valentine’s Day Office Hours Alone

With the next problem set not due until one week later, Math 51 Teaching Assistant Derek Mitchell spent his February 14th, 3:30 pm to 5 pm weekly office hours alone again in Room 380-U. “I didn’t expect there to be anything special, like a whole room of students who wanted to actually learn about...

March 1st, 2009

Tour Guide Really Likes Stanford

Visitors and prospective students visiting Stanford’s campus on February 27th reported that their tour guide, James Strogen ‘10, really seemed to like Stanford. “He only had positive things to say about the people and the institution,” said prospective undergraduate student Alissa Brent. “He...

March 1st, 2009

High School Suck-Up Encounters Much Better Suck-Ups in College

Incoming freshman Ryan O’Connell, who considered himself an “outstanding” suck-up to authorities in high school, experienced a huge shock in his first week at Stanford when he found multiple people much more adept and experienced at the art of brownnosing. “It was just very strange,” O’Connell...

March 1st, 2009