Articles By: Ellis Reid
Four Loko Use Falls, Charlie Sheen use Skyrockets
It’s only been months since Four Loko has been off shelves, and college students have already found a much more dangerous replacement. The popular drink, which combined caffeine and alcohol, was banned by the FDA late last year due to a series of reports that it posed serious risks to young people,...
March 6th, 2011
AlertSU Update
Warning: Pretentious student spotted near the Coffee House. The student was last seen wearing taupe Desert Boots, skinny jeans and a scarf. He may or may not have been wearing a blue or possibly black United Colors of Benetton sweater. Exercise extreme caution! The Stanford Sheriff’s Department considers...
April 19th, 2010
Opinion: Excuse Me, Ma’am, But I Think Your Breasts Are Fake
I’ve seen a lot of breasts in my day, and that set looks nothing like anything I’ve seen before. For starters, they both seem to point the same way. Believe me, the left breast should point left and the right breast should point to the right—that’s how nature intended it. Do I have to remind...
October 19th, 2009


