Articles by: Eric Kofman

Lulu Rating Scandal Erupts on Stanford Campus

March 13, 2013 9:00 amComments Off on Lulu Rating Scandal Erupts on Stanford Campus
Lulu Rating Scandal Erupts on Stanford Campus

PALO ALTO – In a stunning revelation on Tuesday, John DePaul finally admitted to the Flipside that he had paid several campus females to rate him highly on Lulu. Rumors had been circulating for two days before the now defamed DePaul decided to bring the issue to a head. “Hey, […]

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Young, Single Men at Risk

February 28, 2013 9:00 amComments Off on Young, Single Men at Risk
Young, Single Men at Risk

On Thursday afternoon, over a cup of coffee at Coupa Café, Bobby Sears unsuccessfully tried to convince Joanna Tomlinson that she should date him because single men are more likely to start revolutions.   “In fact,” he reportedly explained to her, drawing off of his knowledge of the topic he […]

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Letter from a Concerned Sophomore

February 26, 2013 9:00 amComments Off on Letter from a Concerned Sophomore
Letter from a Concerned Sophomore

This quarter’s going by kind of quickly, don’t you think so? I mean, a lot quicker than last quarter, it seems. Yeah, pretty soon the summer will be here– maybe it’s because we’re all really busy this quarter, or maybe it’s just that the first quarter always seems stretched by […]

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Disney to Release More Truthful Animation

May 19, 2012 6:00 amComments Off on Disney to Release More Truthful Animation
Disney to Release More Truthful Animation

LOS ANGELES — Disney animation studios’ next project will be a horribly uncomfortable, deflating and uninspiring mess of a film, according to journalists who attended a recent press event. It is a step forward for a company that has historically only produced movies that end with most protagonists still alive […]

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Stanford Police To Promote Autocratic Bike Safety Policies

May 5, 2012 6:00 amComments Off on Stanford Police To Promote Autocratic Bike Safety Policies
Stanford Police To Promote Autocratic Bike Safety Policies

In response to an increase in bicycle accidents in the past few weeks, Stanford Police have adopted a new, stricter ticketing policy concerning bike safety. It is based on measures taken by the Soviet Union during the 1960s to counteract political dissidence and control transportation networks. Starting May 1st, students […]

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Student Drops Out to Focus on Beard Growth and Development

February 28, 2012 6:00 amComments Off on Student Drops Out to Focus on Beard Growth and Development
Student Drops Out to Focus on Beard Growth and Development

The young movers and shakers of today’s competitive world often drop out of college to focus on their own endeavors. It therefore came as no surprise to friends of sophomore Joseph Larson when he announced on Friday morning his intention to leave Stanford in order to dedicate himself full-time to […]

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Schwarzenegger Set on Terminating Sex Scandal

May 22, 2011 5:06 pmComments Off on Schwarzenegger Set on Terminating Sex Scandal
Schwarzenegger Set on Terminating Sex Scandal

Sources close to Arnold Schwarzenegger report that the former governor of California has traveled thirteen years back into the past with the express purpose of nipping his current extramarital affair scandal in the bud. Pedro Salavarra, Schwarzenegger’s head gardener, told the Flipside that he last saw the lifter-turned-star-turned-politician running out […]

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The Double-Take: A Killer on the Rise

May 10, 2011 9:00 amComments Off on The Double-Take: A Killer on the Rise
The Double-Take: A Killer on the Rise

A recent study out of Stanford’s Psychology department has found that College Prowler’s new A+ rating of Stanford girls has been accompanied by a spike in the number of male students involved in bike accidents this year. “It’s really quite simple,” said Professor Farling Winston. “The male mind is driven […]

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MTV Cribs To Film Next Episode At Osama Hideout

May 9, 2011 1:07 pmComments Off on MTV Cribs To Film Next Episode At Osama Hideout
MTV Cribs To Film Next Episode At Osama Hideout
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Stanford Admissions Gambling Ring Exposed

May 4, 2011 9:00 amComments Off on Stanford Admissions Gambling Ring Exposed
Stanford Admissions Gambling Ring Exposed

STANFORD– In a dimly lit room in the back of Stanford’s Office of Undergraduate Admissions, a group of admissions officers once sat in silence around a table shuffling through applications. Today, the window shades have been drawn down, and one notices a faint scent of alcohol and dust upon entering. […]

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