Freshman Accidentally Hooks Up with John Arillaga at Full Moon On the Quad

October 29, 2013 9:00 am
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Freshman Accidentally Hooks Up with John Arillaga at Full Moon On the Quad

Billy Rosenstein knew Full Moon the Quad would be an interesting night. But when he heard that he’d locked lips with one of the University’s best known benefactors, he could barely hold back his surprise. Indeed, Billy had claimed a space on his bingo board that few others could: he had hooked up with John Arillaga.

“I mean, he wasn’t a bad kisser or anything” Billy said, “I was just so surprised it even happened. I was out there in my rally gear getting my rage on, and when the clock struck midnight I started looking around for a girl. I saw this one chick I’d met at Admit Weekend, and I guess when I closed my eyes and went in for it, that Arillaga guy must have snuck in.”

While the Arillaga family has declined to comment on the event, rumor has it that an architect has already been commissioned to design an Arillaga Family Mouthwash Booth for next year.

Billy, meanwhile, as been left in confusion. “It was sort of strange” he continued, “but, I mean, it’s college, right?” Billy learned that it can be hard to simply let someone go after physical intimacy, admitting “There is definitely is a kind of wistfulness whenever I walk into the gym. Or the dining hall. Or the alumni center. Most of campus really. I’m only human.”

With time, hopefully, Billy will move on and this will simply be another chapter in the strange history of Full Moon on the Quad.

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