Barack and Michelle Obama Deliver Cloyingly Sweet “State of Our Union” Address

February 19, 2013 12:02 pm
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Barack and Michelle Obama Deliver Cloyingly Sweet “State of Our Union” Address

Given the immense popularity of Michelle Obama and the public admiration of their happy  marriage, the Obamas followed the President’s official State of the Union Address with a nauseatingly cute “State of Our Union Address,” designed to deliver a warm, fuzzy stimulus package directly to people’s hearts.

The Obamas shared humorous G-rated anecdotes sure to elicit amused smiles from democrats and independents.  Said Michelle, “The other day I decided that Sasha and Malia deserved a raise on their allowances, and when Barack heard that, he said ‘Just be glad you don’t have to get congress to vote on that!”

There was also some good-natured ribbing from the couple, as Obama complained about all the unhealthy foods Michelle won’t let him eat, saying, “Your project is to keep the children of America healthy, and I support that wholeheartedly. But come on woman! A good slice of prime rib every once in a while won’t kill me!”

As of press time, Barack and Michelle were feeding each other peanut butter out of the jar with their fingers, while watching ‘Marley and Me’ during their weekly movie night.

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