Local Junior Richard Wood Realizes that Hoover Tower Reminds Him of a Penis

December 1, 2011 11:00 am
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Local Junior Richard Wood Realizes that Hoover Tower Reminds Him of a Penis

Last Thursday, Richard Wood, junior, looked up to see Hoover Tower on his long ride to Creative Writing. “The day was going as usual; I had just eaten lunch and was on my way to afternoon classes. And that’s when I had the sudden realization that Hoover Tower kinda looked like a penis,” commented Wood. Although Wood noted that there were obvious characteristics of the structure that didn’t remind him of a penis, including “bells at the top, a spike on the roof, and windows” that he was “80% sure” the male penis didn’t usually have, it still, as a whole, reminded him of a penis.

“My next thought was, ‘Well, what do I do? Have other people noticed this? Can the university do anything about it?’” Wood added that he finds it hard to believe that the university would purposefully erect a building shaped so similarly to a penis and decided that it must have been an accident that nobody spotted in the blueprint. He plans on pressuring the university later this year to make some modest improvements, including painting the dome on the top the shade of the rest of the building, removing the top spike and replacing it with a fountain, or “at the very least grow some vines up and down the sides of the tower” make the building more appropriate.

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